Bottom Up Regulation

Professor Louis Toledo is one of the world’s top cosmetic buttock surgeons, says David Cowell of Myddleton Croft Investment Managers. And he is the creator of the famous Brazilian Buttock. The cosmetic surgery market is guesstimated to be worth £6bn a year, growing rapidly, but currently unregulated. Just imagine what would happen if the FCA were given the task of regulating it? An M&S voucher for the best estimate.

Watch those G forces

 For govvies, this is wild fluctuation. Volatility of this sort should be setting alarm bells ringing.

Both Fitch and Moody’s have downgraded Tesco’s credit rating. The latter says that it could be dropped further to junk status depending on the outcome of the ongoing investigation into its accounting practices. Moody’s cut the rating on Tesco from Baa2 to Baa3, while Fitch has dropped it from BBB to BBB-.

Confused about what’s going on in the Middle East?

It’s quite simple, really. The US supports the Iraqi government in the fight against ISIS. The US doesn’t like ISIS, but ISIS is supported by Saudi Arabia, who they do like. The doesn’t like Assad in Syria, so they support the fight against him, but ISIS is also fighting against him. The US doesn’t like Iran, but Iran supports the Iraqi government in its fight against ISIS.

So some of America’s friends support their enemies, some enemies are now their friends, and some of their enemies are fighting against their other enemies who they want to lose but they don’t want their enemies who are fighting their enemies to win. If the people they want to defeat are defeated, they could be replaced by people America likes even less.

All this was started by America invading a country to drive out terrorists who were not actually there until America went in to drive them out. QED

Reuters say that at least 11 banks from six European countries are set to fail the financial health check this weekend. The results of the stress tests on 130 banks by the European Central Bank are due to be unveiled on Sunday. Three banks in Greece; three in Italy, and two in Austria are among those that preliminary data showed had failed the tests.

The FCA’s role is to ensure the right incentives are in place for both the regulator and regulated firms, meaning “the rules of the game are such that firms can thrive in the public interest”. Mr. Wheatley said: “To better set these rules we have created, in conjunction with Henley Business School, a master’s degree in financial regulation. This will set a global standard and be open to all, including those we oversee.” If it was ever in doubt that the FCA and its predecessor were empire building megalomaniacs, this should dispel doubt.

Happiness is……..58, according to a survey of 2000 UK residents sampled for Samsung for the launch of its latest gadget. Seemingly, age 58 is the time when people start to enjoy more of life than they hate. Me? I can’t remember.

Savills said it now valued Brandeaux’s student accommodation portfolio at £1.12bn at the end of August, compared to £1.19bn at the same time last year. The 6.1% decline has had an 8.2% impact on the fund’s NAV because of gearing, Brandeaux said. Those that travelled hopefully have now arrived.

With 177 of the S&P 500 companies having posted third-quarter results, 69.5 percent have beaten expectations, better than the 67 percent beat rate over the past four quarters, and higher than the 20-year average of 63 percent, Thomson Reuters data showed. New claims for U.S. unemployment benefits also held below 300,000 for a sixth straight week last week.

In the euro zone, a survey showed businesses performed much better than anyone expected this month, even though it also pointed to strong deflationary pressure in the region.

The ECB on Tuesday began purchasing covered bonds under its new asset purchase programme. The ECB is reported to have bought Spanish, French and German covered bonds with maturities from one to six years. The amounts purchased will be revealed every Monday afternoon by the ECB. QE Lite.

‘China’s policymakers are facing a dilemma: undertaking structural reforms and enduring a period of weak growth or reflating the system via easy credit and fiscal stimulus. We phrased this dilemma two years ago as “short-term pain/long-term gain, or short-term gain/long-term pain”.

For now, China’s money and credit growth continue to decelerate, raising the question of whether recent targeted policy easing has been sufficient enough to reverse the trend.’ BCA’s Emerging Markets Strategy team maintains that China’s credit growth and capital spending will continue to decelerate, and that China’s imports contraction will escalate, weighing on its trading partners. In other words, don’t bet on China leading world growth.

The Australian version of Family Fortunes was forced to apologise when the answers given by 100 people who had been surveyed with the question: ‘Name three jobs usually associated with males and three with females.’ The answers broadcast were:  for males – plumber, builder and mechanic,  and for females – washing up, ironing and cleaning. It’s good to see that the old colonial spirit lives on in the Antipodes.

And finally, an acquaintance has discovered a low-cost method of reducing his house insurance costs. He’s put two Iranian flags in his front garden, one at each corner and the black flag of ISIS in the centre. The local police, MI5, MI6, Special Branch and all the other intelligence services are now watching his house round the clock. He says he’s never felt safer.

Have a good weekend.

David Cowell

Director

For and on behalf of Myddleton Croft Investment Managers

1 Woodside Mews

Clayton Wood Close

Leeds

LS16 6QE

Tel:        0113 274 7700

Fax:       0113 274 7711

www.myddletoncroft.co.uk